I know we haven’t spoken intimately for a while, it’s just that the past couple of months have been absolutely distorting. I went from being sure I wanted to get married to being single, having clear sight of what I wanted to kinda figuring it out, praying fervently to not praying for days. My world has been turned upside down, and I can’t figure out how to adjust well. Most days I feel like am starting to get the hang of things and others I just have no idea what on Earth is going on, being lost has become such a familiar feeling that I start to worry you may not come to my aid. I realize am a control freak of sort, and givingup my Will to you is much harder than singing my favorite song. Am scared that am falling, I just don’t know if you going to catch me before I fall down and crush.
The devil, he has all my weaknesses figuredout and his not giving me a chance to breath. Day after day, am reminded of my weaknesses, and I know you say am forgiven through Christ, but it’s so hard to live feeling forgiven when you keep doing the same mistakes. I know that you know both my weaknesses and strengths, probably better than I do. So today I come to you for help, remind me of yo promises, that you got me in my times of need(Deuteronomy 31:6), that your love for me never ceases(Psalms 136), that even as I walk in the valley of shadows of death you are with me(Psalms23:4), that I am clay being molded(Jeremiah 18),help me keep my eyes on you and not on my circumstances(Colossians 3:2). Remind over over over again, until it feels not only my spirit and soul but body. Let your light shine in me, even in moments when I feel like there’s no sun or light coming through. May you be the hope I hold on to, in these moments of soul searching, may you be the guide on the path am on, my partner in moments of need, my father when I feel fatherless.
I hope you know, scratch that,I know you know that I am eager to be in your peace.
Your loving daughter
4 thoughts on “A letter to God”
Wow my dear Emilie God is will you always just seek the Lord always amd never give up cause he is always with you watching you
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Thanks so much baby girl
Oh dear,He is always up to something and he always wait for our move…to choose to believe,to choose to speak whatever things lovely,just,truth etc,he is always ready remember the spirit is our ever present help in time of need. You only have to believe! I love you Emily!
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Love you too abby